Tuesday, March 16, 2010

exemplary


part of the job is to treat some unsavoury people. sometimes you know what it is they have done. mostly you don't. sometimes you even may make a difference. but mostly you just do your job. after all it is not our part to play judge and jury (and, in our case, executioner). but recently i heard a story from some fellow surgeons about one of their colleagues that i'm sure creates a warm fuzzy feeling in the hearts of all south african surgeons.

i can attest to the fact that after a long night on call your general mood is usually not the best it can be. also it becomes more difficult to see the humour in situations that on a normal day you might be able to laugh off. so when this particular registrar finally wrapped up his post call work and meandered off to his car to go home he was not delighted to find someone busy stealing it. he did what any south african surgeon would want to do in his situation...he shot the guy.

the person in question was, however a surgeon, so his training kicked in. they were already at the hospital so all he needed to do was drag the punctured villain to casualties and get him ready for theater, which is exactly what he did. despite the fact that he was post call, he even took the time to operate the guy himself. i suppose he had the best idea of the tractus of the bullet?

i can just imagine how the post operative ward round went when he presented the case to the prof. how would he have worded it?

"well prof, i shot the guy and then i did a laparotomy. well you always told us we should actively look for work to do if we wanted to get experience."

16 comments:

Jabulani said...

roflmbo

DrV said...

Wondering if the perpetrator got to keep the bullet?

Anonymous said...

Hilarious.
If YOU need extra work, please take Cupid to the OR and remove that arrow from his back. Despite having been face down for awhile his coloring is still good. I think he will do well.
(I may be too sensitive to read medical blogs.)
L.A.

Bongi said...

drv, in this particular story, when you say perpetrator, exactly who are you referring to?

but seriously, the bullets either get left inside the patient (the usual) or they get placed in a sealed container waiting for the police forensics people to come and fetch it. i even know of one case where they actually did fetch the bullet.

rlbates said...

lq2m

Jabulani said...

*chuckle* Bongi that comment leads me think you either a) must have a VERY BIG store cupboard for the removed bullets, or b) the leaving of bullets inside a patient suddenly takes on a whole new reason :) (notwithstanding the safety to the patient)

Bianca Castafiore? said...

i can think of a few things that would make efficiency even more "exemplary" in this oh-so-common situation where one is forced to be victim, hero, constabulary, judge, and surgeon.

for instance...

surely the thief paused at the sight of the gun, thinking that there might be an offer for him to put his hands in the air.

take advantage of that time! break out the surgical prep kit in your car trunk and have him wash and disinfect the area you are about to shoot.

there is always room for improvement...

(this post! a hoot.)

Jayne said...

Brilliant!!

The Girl said...

This is why I love South Africans. You guys are entirely too awesome.

Anonymous said...

Such great advice Bianca! It's in the details...
-SCRN

precordialthump said...

Great story mate.

anne said...

This one is hilarious. If anyone other than you had told the story, I wouldn't believe it.

Bongi said...

anne, interesting to note i was a visitor to your country recently. i saw my first real snow. snow was beautiful, but it was colder than i knew possible.

anne said...

This past winter was extremely cold, and we did indeed get lots of snow. Even my Scandinavian friends complained, so I am not surprised that a South African found it chilly. I hope that you had a nice time, and at least got to go skiing. That is the most popular thing to do in weather like that. As the Scots say: there is no such thing as bad weather, just inappropriate clothes. ;-)

Bongi said...

anne, then i was very inappropriately clothed.

didn't do any skiing. we were there on a congress thing and it was all business. i did manage to irritate a german professor though.

anne said...

Congratulations, welcome to the club. It is very easy to irritate German professors. I do it all the time. I am just grateful that they are not as heavily armed as South Africans ;-)