i had just started my mo year in surgery. i was going to save lives. i was going to make a difference. nothing could disillusion me.
it was my second day and first call. it was surprisingly quiet, probably because the entire population of pretoria was at the coast for the december holiday. then the thorax guys called us to see a patient. i followed my senior, knowing i would be of little help in any situation at this junction in my career. (i had just come out of the bush where i did my internship and community service years. in fact, i had only recently begun to walk on my hind legs and was just mastering rudimentary tools)
the guy was admitted just after christmas (about 6 days previously) with severe chest pain and a left sided 'pleural effusion'. they had placed an intercostal drain and drained a bubbly type of foul smelling liquid. and thus he had remained for almost a week. the only change was that the drainage became much more offensive.
my senior asked him about christmas. how much he had eaten and how drunk he had gotten. had he vomited etc. the patient, although in severe pain, answered that it had been a party to remember. he could remember very little of it. he had vomited copious amounts though and that's when the pain started.
the patient looked up at my senior and said,
'please help me doctor. i can't take much more of this'
'don't worry, we'll help you. you're going to be just fine.' and with that, we turned and left. this is what i signed up for. we were going to get this guy through whatever was wrong. i was, indirectly going to make a difference. i felt excited.
'that guy is dead!' says my senior as we walk away. i was floored. hadn't he just moments ago told the patient he was going to be ok and given a creepy smile of reassurance? hadn't he held the guy's hand and given a squeeze when the patient said 'thank you doctor, thank you so much'?
we got him to theater. the consultant came out. we opened the chest and found that the esophagus as well as the surrounding tissue was necrotic. it had the dirty dishwater appearance that i would later associate with necrotising faciitis. we debrided, but it is a difficult place to debride. you don't want to debride the heart, for instance. it could cause an unpleasant bleed. i was too junior and too far down the table to really follow the finer details of the operation, but we did deliver him, sort of alive, to icu. they pumped precious money and resources into him for a further two days before the inevitable.
he had boerhaave syndrome, a tearing of the esophagus, usually into the left hemithorax, associated with overeating and drinking which in turn causes discoordinated vomiting and voila! if you diagnose it immediately and operate, they have a chance (fair to good). if you give the sepsis time to set in, causing a mediastinitis, the chances drop. if necrosis of the mediastinum has been allowed to develop, no chance at all.
i was totally dissillusioned. my first call and i stood there innocently believeing in our noble profession while my senior lied to someone. ok, the guy maybe felt better emotionally in the last moments of his life, but i could not justify lying to the guy. i also realised there are some fights you just can't win.
